


A Fucked up Thing

by talkingfishsandwich



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Multi, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, really about egobang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-24
Updated: 2015-08-24
Packaged: 2018-04-17 02:40:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4649109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/talkingfishsandwich/pseuds/talkingfishsandwich
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Au where there are soulmate marks that show not the first words your soulmate says to you, but the last.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Fucked up Thing

“I’m sorry, I love you”. What a fucked up thing to have on your wrist. What a fucked up thing for a soulmate to say. Yet here it was, on Dan’s arm in clear sight. He couldn’t help but wonder what happened to his soulmate. They obviously knew they wouldn’t be talking again; did they die slowly in front of him? It had to be something else. Dan just couldn’t handle that thought.

Then again, he couldn’t really stand to think about soulmate marks in general. So he just didn’t, whenever possible. And his life was good. He liked his job, his co-host, and he was pretty sure his soulmate hadn’t come into the picture yet. Honestly he thought it might be better if it stayed that way.

There was another issue with it being the last words though. You couldn’t tell when you first met someone how hard you were going to fall. And Dan cursed himself for falling for Arin, who already had his soulmate. Everyone knew that he and Suzy were made for each other, but Dan was one of the few that knew that Arin’s tattoo read “It’s Suzy, honey”.

He tried to ignore it, move past it, but it just wasn’t happening. And he was almost positive Arin was into him to. Dan really just wanted to be sure, and more importantly, put himself out in the open so he could maybe stop feeling guilty whenever he looked at Suzy.

***

Here was the plan: He was going to ask to talk to Arin, and simply say he had romantic feelings for him. No boundaries would be pushed.

That plan went to shit.

“Hey, Arin, can I talk to you?” He asked, sitting stiffly on the couch.

“Sure, what’s up man?” Arin responded, twisting a little towards Dan. Man, they were sitting kind of close. And Arin looked so inviting, so genuinely interested in what Dan was going to say, that Dan forgot his plan, forgot Suzy, and forgot the boundaries that he wanted to set up.

He leaned in and kissed Arin. And Arin kissed back, for a short amount of time. Then he snapped back. And it honestly took Dan a little while to remember why Arin stopped.

“Suzy.” Dan breathed out, and Arin recoiled slightly. “I’m sorry, I know you love her. She’s your soulmate. I fucked up.”

“Can I fuck up real quick?” Arin asked. “Just once?” He was staring at the ground, but he could still tell when Dan just nodded.

And suddenly they were kissing again. Dan brought his hand up to cup Arin’s face, and their kiss deepened. They went on like this for a while, only stopping when Arin suddenly pulled back again. They had at some point transitioned to be on top of Dan who was practically laying down. Dan whined a bit, but that only managed to make Arin move farther away.

“I’m sorry.” Dan said. And he really was. He felt like shit for doing this to Arin, for kissing him, for kissing him back, for having these feelings.

“Me too.” Arin replied, and Dan sighed.

“You’re always going to choose her, and honestly, you should. Don’t let me get in the way.”

“You’re right, I’ll always choose her. She’s my wife, and I love her.” Even though Dan had just said the same exact thing, that stung. He really didn’t need any more time to make his decision. But he didn’t tell Arin until the next day.

***

“I’m going to head out of the state for a while.” Dan said, standing next to where Arin sat at his desk. At that, Arin spun around, but he honestly didn’t look all that surprised. “I hope I can come back soon. But I don’t know. I have to work some things out.” And that was really it. All that was left was to actually leave.

Arin took him to the airport after he had packed and said goodbye. He told them all the same thing he told Arin, but none of them knew the meaning behind it. He didn’t really answer anything when they questioned him.

“Dude, the office is gonna be so weird without you.” Arin said jokingly. “Too much Ross.” Dan wasn’t sure he could joke with him at this point though.

“I hope you’re alright. I really love you, alright? And I wish…” He looked at the floor, away from Arin who was now staring at him.

“I wish I fucking hated you.” And with that, he walked away, leaving Arin to stare after him with an expression Dan wouldn’t have been able to handle.

“I’m sorry, I love you.” It was quiet, but unmistakable to someone who had thought about that very phrase so many times. Still though, Dan grit his teeth and boarded his plane.

***

Dan just couldn’t sleep. The turbulence was almost as chaotic as his mind right now, and there was really no sleep with either of them. He should talk to Arin, right? Should tell him that he’s Danny’s soulmate, so they had to be together, right? But that would mean it wasn’t right, didn’t it?

In the end, it didn’t really matter. Because he would much rather have Arin not be his soulmate, stay with Suzy and ignore everything that happened. That would be better than if he was Dan’s soulmate. Because that meant they would never talk again. Dan really couldn’t handle the thought of that.

So it was decided. He would talk to Arin. He would call him after he got off the plane. Finally his mind quieted a little bit. But the turbulence was still going strong. This was probably the worst he had ever experienced.

***

The evening Arin took Danny to the airport, he was sitting on his and Suzy’s bed, just thinking. Mainly about Dan and his feelings for him. There was no way he was getting over them, so what was he going to do when Dan came back?

Suddenly, his phone rang, and when he picked up, it didn’t take long for his stomach drop.

“Are you Arin Hanson? Daniel Avidan’s friend?” That absolutely never good.

“Yes, what happened?” He asked. Suzy, who was laying next to him, reacted to his slightly panicked tone and stared at him.

“There was an issue with the plane was on, and it we-” Arin’s hearing really blocked out most of it after that, but he still caught the word “deceased”, and that’s what really mattered.

Thankfully, he had the thought to say, “Thank you for letting me know” before he hung up.

“Honey, what was it?” Suzy asked. Arin somehow found his voice.

“Dan. Dan’s gone.” suddenly, he was crying, and she was pulling him over to her and hugging him tight. “He’s gone.” And Suzy was crying too now.

“I fucking loved him so much.” Arin sobbed.

“I know, we all loved him so much.” She ran her hand through his hair probably just as much for herself as it was for Arin.

“But I loved him like I love you.” There was no thought of how this could be a bad idea to tell her anymore. He just needed someone to understand how much he was hurting, and Suzy was the best bet really. She always understood Arin.

Now, she just pulled him closer. They fell asleep crying together like that, only to be woken up later by a call from Barry. They talked to each other tearily, and Barry said he’d let the others know, so they could get a bit of rest.

“I understood that you loved him. I get it. You two were so close, and I’m only upset that it ended this way.” Arin rubbed at his eyes to try to keep himself from crying once again, but at least a half was happy that Suzy wasn’t upset.

***

There was a lot to putting together a funeral that Arin wasn’t prepared for. But the worst part was when he saw Dan’s mark. It was a tradition to display what the deceased’s mark said and who it was that it applied to. Recently, some people weren’t doing that for personal reasons, but since Dan never said what he wanted, it was up to Arin.

When asked, he just thought he would look at it and see if it was really appropriate to display for everyone. He had to admit, he was also crazy interested to know who Dan’s real soulmate was. He almost wished he had just said no in the beginning.

 _I’m sorry, I love you_. Arin’s last words to Dan. Words that should have been far from the last. Words that should have been the start of a beautiful relationship.

He couldn’t display this, couldn’t show that he was Dan’s true love while he was at his funeral with his wife. He told them not to display it, and they didn’t ask why, thankfully.

Throughout the whole service he thought about that, thought about how much Dan loved him, and how much _he loved Dan_. Why couldn’t he have Dan’s words right next to Suzy’s? He may have chosen Suzy before, but now he knew, neither could really be second to the either. So why was it that he only had one mark? It shouldn’t work that way.

He muddled and cried his way through the service, and afterwards, he told his idea to Suzy, which was met, thankfully with full support.

A few days later, he went to Dan’s grave with flowers and a new tattoo right next to Suzy’s. It read “ _I wish I fucking hated you_ ”.

What a fucked up thing for a soulmate to say.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry. I do hope you enjoyed this though. Or I guess it would be better if it destroyed you. Either way, thanks for reading this!


End file.
